Unimaginable

4 days ago, a fellow blogette lost her husband to pancreatic cancer. They have boy-girl twins who will turn 1 on June 22, 2007. While I haven't read her blog very often and I've never met or spoken to her, I feel so much love and compassion for her at this time. It doesn't matter if she is a complete stranger. A loss of such profound proportions seems to touch me in ways that are unexplainable and I wish I could just give her a hug and say just the right thing to ease her pain. Her strength is so admirable and we could all learn a little something from how she is handling this tragedy.

I think about my own life and what I would do without DH. He is my rock and although we have our normal differences, it is undeniable how much I truly love him and how much he is a part of me. I am a firey Sagittarius and DH my calming, Aquarian force. He helps me to see the logic in things and grounds me, while I teach him to dream and think of what could be. To lose him would be like losing part of myself, not just a limb but a piece of my heart or my brain. Something that would be nearly impossible to live without. I try to take nothing for granted but I can't help but feel that I get sidetracked at times. I focus on my career or having a baby and while I tell him I love him everyday, I feel like I should be doing more to let him know how much he means to me. How important our marriage is. And while expanding our family is a priority, it is us as a pair that provides the foundation for me to lead a happy, fulfilling life.

I can't imagine having 2 babies to remind me of my husband day in and day out, and the life we shared as a family. Looking into their eyes and seeing a part of him staring back at me. It breaks my heart and brings tears to my eyes. At the same time, I am glad he is no longer suffering and can guard and protect the family he left behind.

I am burning a candle in support of my fellow blogette (see left) and I hope you will do the same.Promise to make each moment count, tonight and each and every day.