Wednesday, July 23, 2008

A Matter of When, Not If

*OB appointment alert*

Had my 38 week appointment this morning. And...

I'm 3.5 cm dilated and 80% effaced. That silence? That is me as my eyes bug out of their sockets and my mouth could catch flies.

The OB said that Sunshine's head is "very low" and at this point, we are just waiting on him to decide on his birthday. My body is actually trying to coerce him out. To tell you the truth, I'm afraid to squat and use the bathroom for fear he may plop into the toilet. Do you think I could just walk into the hospital and ask for an epidural now?

She casually mentioned that she is on call this weekend should I go into labor. But the thought of it happening so quickly is surreal. I mean, we are ready. The nursery is finished - aside from a few tiny, random things that haven't arrived yet. We have all the necessary items to take care of a newborn and more. The anticipation is killing me softly. But I'm still in shock whenever I hear I make progress.

She said that with said progress, it is likely I will have a fairly short labor, whenever it does happen. Less than half a day. So it's a good thing those bags are packed. Now, if I can just load them all into the Jeep tonight, we'll be in business. After all, they won't do any good sitting at home on the floor if my water breaks while I'm in BRU finishing up the last of my registry shopping.

I hope that my next update is the one we've all been waiting for. Until then, I wait earnestly and enjoy these last weeks being the closest I'll ever be to my baby boy. As uncomfortable as it is to have a 7 lb. baby using my ribs as a chair or an ottoman, I never want to forget the sensation. I don't want to forget any of it. I wish I could bottle it up somehow so I will always remember this time. I want to meet him so badly but it is hard to think of letting it go and entering the next phase. Will I be a good mom? Will I know what to do to fulfill his needs? It's all just so new and I know these worries are common at this point. I just want to do right by him and give him the life he deserves. I worried so much of this pregnancy away. Now, I want these memories to stay with me and not to ever fade. I want to enjoy it while it lasts.

23 comments:

Kathryn said...

Oh my goodness...any day (or hour) now! Isn't it wonderful that your body seems to know what to do now....will be eagerly awaiting the "he's here!" post! good luck!

Rachel said...

Such an exciting post! Best of luck waiting it out for the next few days.

Blankenship Babbles said...

Um WOW...3.5 on your OWN...you super woman :)~ OMG he is going to be here soon...Jolie says...come out and play... :)~ Thinking of you...and if you find a way to bottle the feeling you have right now...send it my way...I tried my hardest to do so :)~ XOXO

Fertilized said...

woooo YAH for this kind of progress! Can't wait to meet the lil boy!

Shelli said...

You are definitely right. Take IT ALL in and remember every moment of these last days. I wish I'd known to do the same (back before my infertile days)... I would have cherished each moment instead of running through it.

You are almost there.

Road Blocks and Roller Coasters said...

That is great! Anything that shortens the amount time you spend in labor is fantastic and it sounds like you are well on your way! So exciting! I can't wait to read about Sunshine's arrival. HUGS!!!

Stephanie said...

YAY Kristen! You sure said it, a bottle of the feeling from those days would be wonderful. As difficult as my pregnancy was, i miss it!!! the puking and the bed rest....it was magical!
I can't wait to see your little man. You are going to be an AMAZING mommy! You are loving and compassionate and i just know that it will all come naturally to you. When you need advice ask your friends, mom, aunts...and your blog/online friends for it! These are the most exciting days, and I LOVED being in the hospital, labor, deliver, post delivery getting to know your little one...It's all so much fun! I am thrilled for you guys!

Meghan said...

wow...3.5, that is fantastic! So excited for you and can't wait to "meet" your little man

Kenneth said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Emily said...

omg. i am in tears reading this.

i can't wait to see your man in photos!!

you are going to be the best mom ever! I know that.

YEAHHHH!!!!

please update if your water breaks or something... you can't leave your loyal readers in suspense! ;)

8:55 PM

Denise said...

Good luck! I'll be checking back obsessively until the news comes in!

Geohde said...

Yep- nearly 4cm dilated already is pretty impressive. The greatest of good luck with your delivery if I miss it (my own in pretty soon, too),

J

Meg said...

This is so exciting! Here's to a healthy, fast and momentous week ahead my dear.

Jen said...

3.5 cm. Wow! Stage 1 of labor ("early labor") is considered to be 0-4 cm and you're almost past that already. Each time I got to about 4 cm and entered "active labor," things took off like a rocket and I had a baby within a very few hours. You should have a very quick birth.

You'd better leave your car parked facing the direction of the hospital and the first real contraction you have, you'd better get moving! (And if you do plan on getting an epidural, ask for it right away. Not kidding about that; my SIL missed her chance with both of her kids.)

Good luck! I wouldn't be surprised if your next post is the big one!

Melissa said...

I am so excited for you, Kristen. I can't wait to read your birth story. Best of luck & lots of ELV'S!

deanna said...

This is so EXCITING!!! How crazy (and awesome!) that you're already 3.5 cm!!

Best of luck in the upcoming days (I'm saying days because weeks??? I don't think so!)

Ms. Infertile said...

Very exciting! I can't wait to hear the news!
Positive thoughts for a smooth and quick delivery.

M said...

What a great update...I am sooooooo very excited for you and cannot wait to hear of Sunshine's arrival.

Anonymous said...

Been following your blog for quite a while.

Good luck, praying for a quick and easy delivery, and healthy baby boy!!!

alison said...

You and Roadblocks & Rollercoasters are like twins. :) It's awesome you're basically 35% through the dilation process. I'm so excited for you. Sending you big hugs.

Grad3 said...

Exciting!!!

Joy said...

That is awesome! 4cm is when they check you into L&D for officially being in labor so you're definitely at the brink!

Good luck and HAVE FUN!!! Yes, have fun giving birth. I did with my girls! It's the most amazing thing you'll ever experience!!!

Malloryn said...

Very exciting... I'll be thinking about you. :)