Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Post Potpourri

I have so much to talk about so this is going to be a bit of "post potpourri". You know, a little about this and a little on that.

First of all, I just want to commemorate those affected by the tragedy that happened 6 years ago today. Not only those who lost their lives but their families and loved ones and those who risked their lives to save others from the rubble of the Twin Towers. I had my moments of silence at 8:47am and 9:02am and remembered where I was on that fateful day. I happened to be off from work that day and I woke up a little before 9am. I turned on the television and there it was - the first building in flames. It seemed like a movie rather than a live telecast. I watched as the second plane hit and I felt my whole body go numb. This was really happening. And it was no accident. The buildings I had admired years ago in NYC were now a distant memory. I watched as people jumped from the fire, plummeting to their demise. And I cried. I cried at how fearful and terrified those people must have been. I prayed that it would all stop and that no one else would have to die. I remember feeling so helpless and solemn that day. I think it was the first time I really saw a tragedy of that proportion. Things like this happen everyday in foreign countries but I don't see it so I don't really relate to it. But this was my own backyard so to speak.

In the days that followed, I remember watching on television as people sought to pick up the pieces. People posted signs looking for missing people. They were digging through the wreckage, trying to find anyone who might still be alive. Not just medical personnel or firefighters or policemen - but volunteers. I remember feeling that despite such a catastrophe, there really is good in the world. I was reminded of the importance of charity and altruism. After all, we are all in this together. And I will never forget it.

Our short weekend getaway went very well. The weather was absolutely gorgeous - 85 and sunny with a slight breeze. I had a strawberry daquiri at the bar Saturday afternoon (it's 5 o'clock somewhere, right?) and went to the beach, where I laid out in the sun and took a dip in the ocean water. It was cold but felt so good that I didn't want to get out. The waves were rough and I got tackled by one that tumbled me all the way back to the beach. But, thankfully my bikini held up and I didn't flash any naughty bits to the observers.

We got ourselves a suite at this hotel and the only thing missing was a jacuzzi in the room. It was almost as big as our apartment. And probably nicer than the room we had on our honeymoon. It was a shame we only had one night to revel in it.

There was only one small snag in the trip. We figured that the weekend after Labor Day would be perfect since all the kids were back at school and families had already taken their summer vacations. Well, DH and I failed to acknowledge that children 5 and under were not in school yet. Hence, this rule did not apply to them. It was like a damn baby/toddler convention down there. Everywhere we turned (literally) there were infants crying or toddlers playing. At first, it was endearing. But after a full day of watching the happy families on the beach, we both had had enough. I was tired of pining after another lifestyle.

Instead of waiting in line to play putt-putt, watching the adorable families of 4 take their turns - complete with the dad showing the little boy how to swing the club, we said screw it and went shopping at the outlets. Nothing like retail therapy to temporarily heal those wounds.

I began my end of the deal on Mel's happiness challenge this week. DH and I joined a gym and I have pledged to exercise 3 days a week or more for 30 minutes plus. It doesn't have to be alongside DH. As a matter of fact, we often work out separately - he on the free weights and me on the treadmill or elliptical - or even participating in a group step class. I just wanted to do something for me, something that would have long-lasting effects. Getting in shape would certainly do that.

When I work out, I get "in the zone". I pull out my pink iPod (which DH sweetly gave to me as a present for joining the gym with him), turn on The Donnas' Spend The Night album and focus. When I'm exercising, I can get out any aggression or negative feelings I have. I can clear my head. And I like that. It is hard to motivate myself to go sometimes but once I'm there, I don't want to leave. I spend a good hour on the machines. And I feel so good about myself afterwards. I may not see immediate gratification but when the pounds start dropping and I see my body firming up, I will know it was totally worth it.

This endeavor is not so much about losing weight as it is about getting into shape and staying in shape. I've always been slender to average and I'm far from overweight. I could stand to lose about 10 lbs - maybe 15 - or so but no more. I have gained 20+ lbs since I started dating DH but I was probably a bit underweight then. I always assumed I'd just get pregnant and lose the weight afterward (silly me!). I have a stationary job and I'm not very active. Someone my age should be getting much more exercise than I do. It makes me happy to do something good for myself. And if I get pregnant, I could always modify my exercise to low impact. So, I figured what better challenge could there be?

I'll be tracking my progress and I'll post about it when my (first) month is up.

SPOILERS AHEAD - don't read below if you want to see the show for yourself before reading my review.

Okay, who tuned in to Tell Me You Love Me (TMYLM) on Sunday? Or should I say P-O-R-N-O. It was so provacative at times I felt as though I was watching soft core action. Not to say it was gratuitous. I believe the sex scenes fit with the storyline and overall theme of the show. They were just...wow. Pretty graphic. Even for HBO. I think I was blushing at one point since DH was sitting just a few feet from me.

I really liked the fly-on-the-wall approach. We were given these glimpses into the intimate lives of these couples and it is like we are silently watching from afar. It feels real and helps me to emotionally connect with the characters. Without that kind of development, I could care less about what goes on with them and I lose interest quickly.

To sum it up nicely for those who don't know - there are four couples. One couple is in their forties - they have a family of 4 and seem very happy with each other, but yet their sex life is nonexistent. Another couple is in their twenties - they are newly engaged and have lots of sex but it tends to cover up their true feelings about the relationship. And another couple is in their thirties. They have just reached the year mark for TTC and are in counseling for how to deal with it. The fourth couple is an elderly man and woman. The woman is the therapist for the couple in their forties and the couple in their thirties. I haven't quite figured out if she is a couples therapist, sex therapist or both.

I won't go into detail about all of the couples' lives but I will focus on the IF couple. I thought the first scene with the pee stick was pretty accurate. I don't usually pee in front of DH but when she threw it in the sink after getting a BFN, I have totally felt like doing that. Although afterward, I pull out the Ben & Jerry's rather than talking about random stuff and acting like nothing happened.

I was pretty irritated that the therapist's assignment for the couple was to not think about babies or TTC for a week. How do you not think about it? I hate the game. Like you're supposed to go back in and talk about how you couldn't not think about it and what can we do to get past it. Just get to the point.

I thought it was pretty realistic that they didn't open up to the therapist right away about their sex life. I would find it a little hard during the first session myself. The flashback showed the girl telling the guy she was ovulating but he couldn't perform on cue. Definitely something we've probably all experienced at some point or another.

I liked the part when the girl's (or guy's - I can't recall) mother started bringing up having a baby at dinner. Obviously, they hadn't broken the news to family that they had been trying. And when she went in the bedroom to cry, I thought they nailed it on the head - the depression that ensues after someone's ignorance. Of course, the couple had sex while their guests waited. I have to say I cheered them on. I sometimes wish I could do that but I'd be too scared someone would walk in and catch me in the act. It was nice to see them let loose a little.

What did you think about her going to the RE without telling her DH? She told him she went for a massage instead. I didn't think it was good to start the process without his awareness and support. She was being very manipulative. Especially when she gave him a HJ and was analyzing his semen. Like you can really tell anything from that anyway. And she automatically assumed the problem lies with DH because her ultrasound testing came back normal. From what I could tell, she hadn't had any blood tests which are routine for a first visit so I don't know how accurate the clinic scene was. When she asked about donor insemination, I kind of cringed. She is blaming her DH without having done any research on what the problem could be. Ever hear of unexplained infertility? She seemed very uneducated about IF in general. And her sneaky ways did not make me sympathize with her too much. I hope her character evolves more over the course of the season.

Overall, I thought the series started off well. I will definitely continue to watch. What were your thoughts? Did you think it was an honest portrayal of IF?

Just a sidenote: For being 24, I didn't relate to the youngest couple at all. I felt more in touch with the thirties and forties couples than I did the twenties couple. Does that make me older at heart?


Katie said...

There is a movie called "A Smile Like Yours," which is about an infertile couple. The wife tricks her husband by giving him a. . . ahem. . . well, by doing. . . ahem. . . collecting his sperm. . .uh, orally, and then taking it for an analyis without his knowledge. At the time, I thought it was funny. Now, I just think it is sad. And unrealistic. How can you rely on an orally tainted sample for good results? I don't think going to a RE without the support of your spouse is a good idea, because you need them eventually. And how are you planning to break it to them that you have already been seeing this doctor for years? Other than that, I am tempted to tune into this particular program. What channel/time?

Baby Steps to Baby Shoes said...

You hit the nail on the head with your description of the show. I gave a briefer, but similar, analysis of some of the lack of accuracy of the medical aspect of it all on my blog.

Glad you enjoyed your time away!

megan said...

glad to hear you enjoyed your time away!

lub said...

I don't have HBO so I LOVED your spoiler. I am hoping you will continue to post so I can get my fix. It will be something I rent when it comes out on DVD (if it comes out on DVD). I have been trying to work out 3-4 times a week as well. FJ doesn't work out- he's a naturally fit person, but I wish he would. I hope you continue to enjoy it! BTW, I have a pink IPod too!!!

lub said...
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chicklet said...

The show made me crazy - loved it, think it has potential, but it's also some CRAZY shit! Who goes to the RE and doesn't tell their hubby? Wow, holy. And the softcore action, mama mia - that was quite the handjob. So I liked it, I think they have good characters, I think it'll just get better, but I think HBO was doing its thing and putting lotsa sex in to make a point:-)

Courtney said...

Your recent getaway sounded so nice. I might just need to look into that for myself.

*Thank you for the kind comments.

Elizabeth said...

"i can't believe I read the whole thing!" :-) Just kidding, I love long posts. Very interesting, your take on the show. I'm with you on the working out thing too - I finally did my pilates dvd today that I'd been neglecting for a week.

LeRoy Dissing said...

Glad your short getaway went well. I find that when you are not around kids daily, you have to adjust in doses - lol. I can relate to your wanting to head to a mall or stores just for peace & quiet.

Exercise is great. I am a walker and I walk day or night, usually alone but I really enjoy the time and the benefits. Keep it up!

I don't have HBO so haven't seen this show but I am sure it is dramatized for entertainment purposes. I don't think you are older at heart for relating to folks who are older. They are going through experiences you can relate to which probably has nothing to do with age but (dare I say it?) maturity.

Gabby said...

In response to your comment on my post today, I came home today and POAS. What do ya know! It came back positive. So hah...I guess we won't be abstaining for that s/a after all! That can wait! The baby making can not!

Debby said...

Glad you had a nice trip. I love Ocean City - it's a relaxing spot and home to some of my favorite eats and drinks. One fav to try next time you get out that way is Liquid Assetts on 94st street. Great wine bar where you can get yummy food and cheese plates too. DH and I went to up there after m/c 2 and had a great time sitting on bar stools drinking and commiserating for a few nights.